You know that moment, when you figure out something that you were so sure of your ENTIRE life is a lie? I know that I, myself have had plenty of those moments. It's that moment when you sit there in doubt of everything and just can't really talk about it, and you never seem to get a grasp of it.
Here are a few examples;
- When you figure out that the notches on a toaster stand for minutes, not level of toastiness.
- When you find out that you have been using bobby pins incorrectly for literally your entire life
- When you discover that they don't lay individual bricks into the sidewalk.
- When you find out "No Tears" shampoo wasn't to prevent kids from crying, it's to prevent tangles. (Yeah, I know.. all those pain-filled moments of having shampoo in your eyeballs that was a false promise from a bottle wasn't actually a lie)
- THIS. THOSE LAZY BUTT HEADS IN DEPARTMENT STORES DON'T EVEN FOLD THEIR TOWELS, NO. BUT THEY LIE TO EVERYONE ABOUT THEIR PERFECT APPEARANCE.
- When you find out Nutella is pronounced "new-tell-uh" not "nu-tell-uh". Don't believe me? Go to the Nutella FAQ page. You will be as thoroughly disappointed as I.
- When you see all your friends pictures from meeting the Weasley twins at ComiCon, and THEY AREN'T ACTUALLY RED HEADS.
- Footlongs from Subway aren't actually a foot long.
- WHEN BUFFALO WILD WINGS DOESN'T ACTUALLY GIVE YOU A SPECIFIC NUMBER OF WINGS, IT'S ACTUALLY DONE BY WEIGHT.
- When you find out the proper multiple of Octopus is Octopodes, not Octopi.
- When you figure out baby carrots are actually just cut out of big carrots, like.... why?
I am very sure that most of you knew these things, and I am sure I will think of more, but I just felt it was necesary for everyone to know my thought crippling moments of finding out my life is a whole lie.
xx Mishea
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