You know on special days like birthdays, or the holidays, or even when you're having a rough time, or you're sick and you get a really sweet text message? The ones that are filled with a lot of heart felt things, and just make you smile. Those ones that make your day so much better, and you feel grateful to have someone like that in your life, only to look up to the horror of having no idea who sent it to you?
I fear this more than probably any other awkward situation.
It's the inner conflict that you have with yourself about whether you should respond with a "Thank you so much, you're great!" and risking an on-going conversation with heaven knows who, or being the jerk that asks "Sorry, who is this..?". Because for all you know it could be someone you were temporarily mad at, and deleted their number, someone that was just swiped from your contacts for a number of reasons, or someone that you just forgot or didn't want to save into your contacts. And you have no idea how many times you've used the "I'm truly sorry, I lost all of my contacts." excuse on them.
And usually around the holidays I don't worry much if it's just a general message for said holiday, but when it's the ones that were made just for you. I feel like a HUGE jerk when I ask who it is. Especially around my birthday, I get really anxious and nervous about not knowing who is telling me a Happy Birthday, and I don't want to be mad at someone for not telling me happy birthday when they actually did and I just was too scared to ask who it was.
I struggle with being seen as someone that has the potential of being rude. When people say that I'm intimidating, I feel bad and I ask them why so I can try to fix it because I want to be that heartwarming person that is always there with a smile on their face. So when it comes to me asking someone who it is after they spent so much time to tell me all this awesome stuff, and I don't know who it is, and I can't thank them personally. I hate the gut wrenching feeling that they could be like "wow, how rude is Mishea for not having my number..?"
I know it's just anxiety, and one of the multiple reasons why I am an awkward person but it's really something that I fear, and why I'm talking about it is because I know it will happen tomorrow.
Wish me luck...
xx Mishea
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